Traditional Wedding Customs

Traditional Chinese wedding customs are very different from those of modern China.

Selecting auspicious dates

Auspicious dates are required for the wedding, the betrothal and the installation of the bridal bed. A Chinese monk, a temple official or a fortune teller are able to advise on a suitable date based on the couple's birth dates and times. Some may also refer to the Chinese calendar or almanac for good days. Usually, even numbered months and dates are preferred, and the lunar seventh month is avoided as it is the month of the Hungry Ghost Festival.

After the selection of the auspicious dates, wedding details such as types and quantities of betrothal gifts, return gifts, bride's price, and number of tables at the wedding banquet provided by the groom's parents for the bride's parents' guest are decided on.

Betrothal

Up to a month and at least three days before the wedding day, the groom and a friend or a matchmaker will deliver the betrothal gifts on the auspicious date chosen.

Western and Chinese wedding cakes and peanut candies, together with two bottles of brandy, at least six tins of canned pork legs and even number of oranges are included in the wedding gift baskets. Two pairs of dragon and phoenix candles are also included. Also included is gold jewellery from the groom's parents to the bride, such as the Cantonese Dragon and phoenix bangle or the four items of gold.

Some include the bride's price with the betrothal gifts, whereas some will only present it when the groom fetches the bride.

In the return gifts, the 2 bottles of brandy will be replaced with 2 bottles of orange syrup. An even numbered portion of all the other gifts are returned to the groom's family together with the 2 phoenix candles. The bride's side will light the 2 dragon candles and the groom's side the phoenix candles on the morning of the wedding day.

Some hokkien families will also ask for a bunch of bananas and red dates to be included in the return gifts. A red packet for the groom's parents to buy shoes is required. The bride will also present towels to the parents, grandparents, aunt, uncles and groom's siblings.

After the betrothal, the Chinese wedding invitations are distributed.

Delivery of the bride's dowry

The bride's parents may include the bride's dowry with the return gifts on the day of betrothal or deliver the dowry a few days before the wedding. The Chinese dowry typically include:

- beddings such as pillows, bolsters, comforter set, blankets, bed sheets, etc., all tied with red ribbons;